4 more days to K & J’s wedding… getting so stressed…and I still have so much to finish!! NOT ENOUGH TIME!!! ARGH!!!!! My sweet boss has offered her help….I’m eternally grateful… A little relieved when she offered her hands today… *phew!*

Been getting support from sis this few days…feel more grounded knowing she’s there. A lil’ steadier. Otherwise, don’t know how in the suckiest world I would manage to cope at all. But the nights are so long.. can’t sleep, nightmares..bad dreams…images & thoughts of things I don’t wanna see & know. It’s taking away all my energy. None left for work during the day.

Got a message from FW yesterday during my leave. She’s so sweet, asked me if I was feeling better & cheering my up. Thanks a million, you have no idea how much it meant to me.

Apart from all the people I’ve been mentioning, the people who are supposedly my very NEXT-OF-KIN(family) are the ones adding to my problems. They’re all pissing me off & irritating the SHIT out of me.. especially my okaasan..sickening attitude problem again. I didn’t irritate her! I was trying my very best to be nice & patient with her regardless of how shitty I feel right now but all I get is a fucking attitude?  WTF?? Why the hell do I deserve this? Why the hell am I even putting up with it??!! Somebody TELL ME!!!!

For a change, I’m not gonna curse at anyone. Instead of hoping people drop dead, hey….how bout I drop dead for a change, huh?!

thank you sis, I LOVE YOU 2!!